Santa's Rules:

• Santa looks like Santa. HOLIDAY APPAREL IS MANDATORY. A Santa hat is not enough. Get a Santa suit. Buy a Santa suit. Make a Santa suit. Steal a Santa suit. Get creative: be a Secret Santa, a Santasaurus, Candy-cane, a Reindeer, a Chanukah Chicken, a goddamn latke, Stewardess Santa, Knight Rider Santa, Crusty Peace Punk Santa, the occasional Legless Reindeer, Chanukah Squirrel, Emo-Elf, or the Santichrist.
  Just don't wear your fucking jeans.
• Santa acts like Santa. Be jolly. Belly-laugh. Let people sit on your lap. Give out gifts.
  Santa loves reindeer games, stripper poles and creatively concealed guzzle-ables.
• Santa doesn't seek media attention. "Ho-ho-ho" is good. "Publicity ho" is lame.
• Santa doesn't get arrested. Please remember the FOUR FUCKS:
1. Don't fuck with kids.
2. Don't fuck with cops.
3. Don't fuck with security.
4. Don't fuck with Santa.

Santa's List

Santa's Guidelines:

IT'S A LONG DAY, SO BE PREPARED. Here's some tips to keep your sleigh running.
• Eat something.
  Santa is responsible for his own feeding! This is New York City -- if reindeer can figure it out, so can you.
• Stay hydrated & pace yourself.
  Try some water in between your milk and cookies.
• Bring a DD or get a ride.
  Santa doesn't like dwi's and dead people.
• Santa is responsible for his own inebriation.
  SantaCon is NOT a bar crawl -- it's a convention. There will be bar stops, but they will be VERY crowded. Santa does not advocate breaking open container laws! Santa's just sayin'...
• Pay your own damn bar tab and tip bartenders well for putting up with Santa.
• Dress warm.
  Wear layers so you'll be comfortable anywhere from the North Pole to the strippers' pole.
• Stay with the group.
• Don't be "that" Santa.
  Your friends want to have fun, not scrape the puke outta your beard or prevent your wasted ass from wandering into traffic.
• Santa does not make children cry (unless they whine, snivel, or otherwise deserve it).
  Really - If you see kids, give them nice toys, candy, or something pleasant. Feel free to urinate on the parents. Tourists fall somewhere in between the two -- adjust depending on their attitude.